True Confessions

Shoutout to Skillz for creating one of the most entertaining things I’ve seen lately, Hip-Hop Confessions. It began as a website which has since made its way to MTVJams as a half-hour special. On this show, everyone from fans to artists are able to shoot the shit about their likes/dislikes/unpopular opinions/etc. regarding hip-hop (the wildest being Joe Budden’s admission to never having owned a KRS-One album). Everybody has a few, and since I’m no rookie at lettin’ out some of my own crazy-ass admissions, here’s a few more to wrap your head around:

1. Jay-Z’s Speed-Raps? Nnnnah: For all the great things he’s done, I think the best decision Mr. Carter’s ever made was getting off that “jiggedy-jiggedy-Jay”-type shit. If that didn’t happen, there’s a lot that would be missing from these last 14 years of music and pop culture- including him. Outside of one or two songs, I can really do without the whole early-mid ’90s speed-rappin’ Jigga. Incidentally, I do like “Nigga What, Nigga Who” from the Hard Knock Life album- he’s practically doin’ the same thing, but the execution is MUCH better than that money-machine-sound-effect shit he was on before.

Jay-Z “I Can’t Get Wit Dat” (1995)

2. I’ve Never Heard A UGK Album: I understand why they’re highly regarded. I understand Pimp C’s acclaim as a producer, and that Bun B is one of the most respected lyricists from the South. Still, I’d be lyin’ if I said they were ever on my radar like that. Though I’ve known of UGK since “Pocket Full Of Stones” from the Menace II Society soundtrack, there was always a gang of other stuff I was more interested in hearing whenever they had an album out. Maybe I should make it a point to check out one of those albums someday. In the meantime though, as it stands on September 29, 2009… I’ve not heard one in its entirety.

UGK “One Day” (1996)

3. Common Sense > Common: It’s almost a cliche to like the introspective, mature, kinder, gentler, hemp sweater-wearing Common who loves all the children and deaf chicks. Me myself personally? Eh. I’m much more a fan of the brash, comical Common Sense who made songs about cockblockers and such. I even rock with the Common Sense that teetered between the comical and the introspective on Resurrection. But it all pretty much ended for me when he got into cuttin’ up pieces of mango and shit. I’m not sayin’ artists can’t evolve as musicians and human beings. I’m just sayin’ Erykah Badu might be some kinda witch who turns rappers into hippies.

Common Sense “Soul By The Pound (Remix)” (1993)

4. If I Never Hear “Hip-Hop Hooray” In My Life Again, I’m Good: There’s a lot of songs I’ve heard over and over that I still don’t get tired of. I may not listen to ‘em every day, but I don’t mind hearin’ them whenever they might happen to pop up on the iPod. There’s this one song though… this one song that I could live to be 100 and die the next day without hearin’ anymore: fukkin’ “Hip-Hop Hooray” by Naughty By Nature. It’s not that I think it’s a bad song, even tho’ the hook is kinda hokey- it’s just that I’ve heard the shit so much. I’ve literally been sick of it since like ‘93, and I don’t see that changing.

Naughty By Nature “Hip-Hop Hooray” (1993)

5. I Actually Like “Pumps & A Bump”: Um, yeah. That “Pumps & A Bump”. The Hammer song from when he tried to come back on some tough shit. The song that’s supposed to be about scantily-clad women, but is mostly remembered for him dancin’ around the pool with his dick aaallll in the videooo. I don’t care for any of that business, but I like that beat, and that part at the end when Aaron Hall starts goin’ in. Of course this song is awful, and I know this- but the sheer retardation of it is what makes it entertaining to me. Now bring them pumps and flex that bump.

Hammer “Pumps & A Bump” (1994)

There’s many more where those came from, and I might throw ‘em out there at another time, but I feel I’ve embarrassed myself enough for one day. Now, it’s time for y’all to come clean: what are some of your confessions? I won’t tell nobody…

-D!