Bobby & Whitney: A Tale of Blood, Sweat, & Hell To The Naw

Y’know… far be it for me to be into relationship drama involving artists who decide to shack up. I see the headlines like everyone else, but I’d be hard-pressed to remember much about what Jay-Z and Beyonce do, or who Lil’ Wayne will be knockin’ up next. I find the Nas/Kelis shit to be pretty got-damn wild because of how brutally Nasir’s been gettin’ his pockets raped since last year, but that’s about it. HOWEVER- there was one couple from the ’90s that always brought the laughs and SMH moments- the duo of Bobby Brown & Whitney Houston.

It’s a classic case of that couple that made you wonder “how the hell’d that happen?” Lo and behold, it didn’t happen the way everybody thought it did. For years, people made it like Whitney was the innocent pop singer who got conquered by this hardcore singin’ nigga who corrupted her and drove her down the wrong path. Come to find out, as it is in most cases, she was the one who went looking for that. While everybody was cryin’ for Whit, she (by her own admission) was the bored superstar who went lookin’ for something a lil’ more on the wild side. She found it at the 1989 Soul Train Awards when she met Bobby, and the rest is history.

In the early-’90s, when Whitney was singin’ the Star-Spangled Banner and Bobby was humpin’ stages, it seemed normal enough (at least by that standard). But when the shit jumped off for the public… woooow. First, there was talk of domestic violence, but that was about it. Besides, Bobby’s had problems with physical aggression since the “Mr. Telephone Man” video, so it didn’t seem like much of a surprise there.  The drug shit, however, is what really threw everybody. I knew Whit was beamin’ up when she went onstage at an award show and said Bob was “the original king of R&B”. I mean, I like Don’t Be Cruel as much as the next man, but… what? Then, performance after sweaty performance, her drug problem was probably the worst-kept secret ever, even as they both denied it.

By the end of the ’90s, they were far away from what they were at the beginning, but nothing tops their post-’90s antics. From Whitney askin’ Diane Sawyer for drug receipts and announcing that crack is wack, to Bobby doin’ karate kicks in Ja Rule videos, both of their careers were practically a wrap. Their only relevance came in the form of news and rumors surrounding their drug use and random incidents. Then, in the age of reality TV, came the height of all their craziness- Being Bobby Brown. It was like watchin’ Pookie and the “prom fiend” from New Jack City on a weekly basis. And even though it was centered mostly around Bob, the most off-the-wall shit came from Whit. Whenever I’d hear people talk about the show, it would never be “yo, Bobby’s wild as shit”- it was always “yo, Whitney is fucked up.”

In ’06, after roughly 14 years married, Bobby & Whitney finally called it a day. In recent years, they’ve both taken liberties in throwing each other under the bus, blaming each other for the drugs and abuse. Bobby has seemingly kept it movin’ and gotten himself together, recently gettin’ engaged to some broad about a month or so ago. He still has that fukked-up jaw, but there’s not much he can do about that. Whitney mounted a sort-of comeback last year, but she appears to be back off the wagon if any of her recent performances are any indication. It’s still insane how hard she fell off, but I’ve seen it happen to people in real life, so I guess it shouldn’t be too much of a shock.

As much as the Brown/Houston marriage provided a gang of unintentional comedy, it’s also a tragedy. It’s a prime example of what happens when two people with lots of money and nothing better to do find themselves caught up in drugs and self-destruction. In the beginning, they seemed to keep up a public image that everything was alright, but by the end, they were too fucked-up to even fake it.

Bobby Brown feat. Whitney Houston “Something In Common” (1992)

-D!